Sunday I had a major scare. I thought I was going to lose my dad less than 3 years after losing my mom.

I was asleep while my dad was at church.  I wake up to people pounding on the front door and my windows. That scared the snot out of me but I figured it was him wanting me to unlock the door because he'd forgotten his keys. I looked out the window but didn't recognize the two cars in the driveway. I normally would cower in my room and not answer the door out of fear but meh, I was willing to risk it. It turned out to be a couple from church. They told me my dad had been taken to the ER. I was so shocked and confused... "What happened?" is all I could manage to ask. They told me he had been sitting up in front of the church and slumped over, then started vomiting on himself. Again, I didn't understand what was going on. I know my dad wouldn't voluntarily go to the ER unless it was life threatening...

I began getting dressed and tried to forced myself to eat something so I didn't wind up passing out. I could barely chew...and I was shaking uncontrollably all the way to the ER.

When I got to the ER, I saw my aunt, uncle, and dad's good friend standing outside his little room. Then I saw my dad was at least conscious, so I was slightly relieved (even though I still didn't understand the slumping over and puking part). He'd been sick for several days thinking it was a sinus infection. I started to wonder if he had a bad reaction to some medicine he'd possibly taken.

My aunt started telling my dad, nurses, and me about the events that had happened. After he had slumped over, he had passed out for about 10 minutes. A lady at church who had been a nurse, among others in our church family, came to his rescue. While waiting for the ambulance, I thought my aunt had said that he stopped breathing for 30-60 seconds. But I learned through people on Facebook that it was his HEART that had actually stopped! The lady had used a defibrillator to get it going again. And I found out the defibrillator is thanks to a late gentleman who made sure our church had one on hand. I feel like becoming a defibrillator activist now.

Even more terrifying, he had contemplated staying home since he wasn't feeling his best. If he had stayed home, had this happened at the house, I would've been asleep and probably not known anything was going on. Even if it had happened at home and I had been aware of it, if his heart stopped, I wouldn't have been able to do anything about it while waiting for an ambulance.

Back to the ER, they ran all kinds of test on him, scans and xrays... Then a doctor came in and told us it was the flu. ...the freakin' flu! However, I think that was the most relieved I've ever been. I could tell my aunt was extremely relieved too. My dad was just dumbfounded. He hasn't had the flu in over 50 years. We've never had any issues with the flu in my family during my lifetime... We would've never guessed the flu could cause those problems. At the time I had been fearing that it could've been a full-on heart attack, stroke, or cancer coming back with a vengeance (like it did with my mom...).

So thankfully they released him to come home shortly after the diagnosis.

Although I'm not sure if I'm coming down with the flu now or if it's just from work. Ever since I've been working, I've had a lot of respiratory problems (and was even bed-ridden for over a week, which luckily coincided with the week that we were off from work due to the weather, so I didn't miss any actual work days). If it's not the flu, I may wind up quitting just for health reasons.

But anywho, I'm soooo grateful for everyone who helped out my dad and came to his rescue, all the prayers, and for the fact that it was just the flu (which yes, isn't something anyone really wants)!

Just another, somewhat brief (oh, I could really go into some major details but won't right now...) update, it turns out the guy who was my boyfriend of nearly 2 years is a complete loser! He faked depression, using it as an excuse to break up with me. He claimed that he didn't wanted to be around anyone, would rather be alone, and didn't want a relationship. When he initially told me this in person, wanting to break up, I wouldn't let it happen. When you truly love someone, you DON'T GIVE UP on them!!!! He deactivated his Facebook (I thought that was wise for a depressed person) but like 2 days later, reactivated it, unfriended me, and then blocked me. I let it go, figured he wanted to keep up the charade to others wanting them to think that he was ok... I didn't give up on him, never wanted to, but I was trying to be respectful and give him the space he needed. Then about a week later after an exchange of texts, he texted me to break up, again, I HATED it but I thought it would be better to give him the space. I did text him a few times to check in and managed to get a response...

Two months later, still worried sick about him, I find out that he's back on Plenty of Fish. He deleted his originally account, blue_eyed_guy_84 after we became official. Oh but now the sleaze-bag has gone with blueeyed_guy84 . (I'm seriously hoping girls on there are looking up the guys before meeting them!)

He was hardcore about being up front and honest with one another. He also was extremely assuring about how he'd never hurt me or break my heart. He had many opportunities and at least 2 months to come clean about WHY (I'm still uncertain as to why, he told me I did nothing wrong, it wasn't my fault, I was the perfect girlfriend...) he no longer wanted to be with me. He convinced me all along that he was so serious about our future together and getting married...

But now he's trying to hook up with random girls. Just... WHAT THE HECK!?!?! 

When your world falls apart, you've got to put it back together. I don't have many left in my support system but I am very grateful for those who care and do their best to help.

Life is a struggle. I doubt it's truly easy for anyone...

But the ones who are strong are the ones who admit they need help. They are the ones who try to better themselves. The weak ones are the ones who wither away because they think they are above seeking help.

Ulta Haul

Recently I received a flyer in the mail from Ulta with a little coupon card that was good for 300 points ($9) to spend at Ulta by last Saturday's date. I got to thinking and couldn't really come up with anything specific to buy before last weekend came. Then Friday morning I received an e-mail stating that I had 350 points ( I had earned more through actual purchases) or $11 to spend in store before the 300 expired. I really wanted to get something high-end to make me feel like I was getting a complete bargain. I already talked myself out of the new Urban Decay Shadow Box palette (I had too many similar colors and people complained that the shadows weren't up to par with the individual shadow pots). Then I thought that I would get a Moondust eyeshadow. Stargazer, the gold one interested me since I'm still on the hunt for the "right" gold shadow. But my store was all out of the Moondust shadows, and only had a couple of testers in the spot (they didn't even have the Stargazer tester so I'm not sure if it's the shade of gold I'm looking for). I looked all around, nothing really caught my interest. 

I've always wanted the Stila Kitten eye shadow... I found a palette up front with the "on the go" items that was a Stila nudes palette. It had some eye shadows, a blush, and an all-over color. Kitten was the all-over color, and the palette was only $20 so I was about to buy it. But I couldn't find testers of the shadows or blush to get a true feel for the colors or quality, so I was hesitant. Then I decided on my back-up plan.

I had glanced over at the drugstore brands but didn't find a whole lot that interest me without really looking in depth. However, I did have a $3.50 off of $10 coupon that I could use, meaning I could bump up the value to $14.50 off of a drugstore brand purchase. I like NYX cosmetics...at least the lip products and jumbo pencils. I've only had one eye shadow but the pigmentation was faint and different from in the pan. The eye products were "buy one, get one 50% off." I noticed that the baked shadows had testers so I started looking through those. I came across one color that appeared duo-chrome, which then I remembered seeing something on Makeup Alley about some of the newer NYX shades being duo-chromey and space inspired. Well, that one shadow, Cosmos, was the only duo chrome shadow I could find. But I had to have it! Then I settled on Ghetto Gold (still not pleased with the shade of gold but it's still a versatile shadow). Then I remembered that they carry Essence and a lot of people seem to like Essence. I found some glitter shadows (no testers) and then some shadow duos (with testers). So I ended up getting a glitter shadow, Metal Glam in N'ice Frosting and one of the 3D duos in Irresistible Vanilla Latte. 

Here's the great part. The NYX shadows were $5.99 each, so with the sale, they were roughly $9 together. The Essence Metal Glam was $2.99 and the 3D duo was $3.49. After the discounts and tax, my total was $1.05! Woo!

(NYX Baked shadow: Cosmos & Ghetto Gold, Essence: 3D duo Irresistible Vanilla Latte, Metal Glam N'ice Frosting)

Restoring Jewelry Tip

I stopped making a lot of jewelry with the chain that you find in craft stores because base metal stuff tarnishes so quickly, and I thought there was no way of restoring it once it turned (since it wasn't a quality metal). I know there's a lot of others who thought this way too. I know many who have thrown stuff out because they didn't think it was worth trying to find out if it could be saved or not.
Turns out toothpaste (tried the blue gel kind that has baking soda in it) cleans it also (knew you could use it on fine metals). It seems to work on that cheap costume jewelry from Claire's, Icing, Forever 21, etc... too! Now I feel much more confident about making things again from the base metal stuff. Yayness!

Teavana =/= Nirvana

Um, Teavana was not at all what I expected. The one at the mall where I work is an itty, bitty, teeny, tiny, little store. There were literally five customers (including myself) and three employees (but two of them  alternated going to the back stock area) and no room to move around unless someone stepped outside of the store. And I didn't realize that it was set up like a deli where the associate is required to assist you and weigh out the tea (since the teas are stored in large containers), which makes sense. But I thought that everything would already be prepackaged, which would also make it accessible so that one could compare and contrast or browse in peace. But I'm just being picky about that since I like to have a nice, big bubble around me when I shop and thoroughly examine the product I'm interested in purchasing.

I browsed the site ahead of time to see what was offered and how much. I wanted to get the Acai Matetini Mate loose tea because it has acai (super antioxidant), looked like it had a fun blend, and was one of the less pricey teas. I also was on the lookout to find the small Teavana Perfect Tea Maker, since the site showed it was on sale for less than $14. I was thinking about getting an infuser but those were about $13 on the low end so the Perfect Tea Maker seemed to be a winner, plus it had raving reviews. I found the Tea Maker pretty easily and was glad to see the sale price applied in the store.

I made the mistake of telling the first sales associate I encountered that it was my first time there and I wasn't entirely sure how it all worked. I saw the "Wall of Teas" but knew that I only wanted the Acai Matetini and let her know that up front. She then went to the back to get a male associate to help me, and she took my Perfect Tea Maker away from me which was confusing since I was at the counter/register but meh, whatev. I think she went ahead and bagged it when she went to the back because I didn't see it again until the bag was handed to me.

Anywho, once Dude was caught up with my brief story of being a Teavana virgin, he opened the container and did all the magical wave and sift pizzazz. My main question was how did the measuring process work since the website started at 2 ounces. I was hoping it was like a fabric store or deli, where you could request half the "basic amount" (1 yard or 1 pound seem to be a good standard starting point). Sidenote: I worked in the deli/bakery of a major grocery store, people ordered various ways... "Give me a 1/4 a pound." "I want 7 slices." "Start slicing and let me stop you when it looks good." I was kind of hoping that there would be leeway to ask for half a scoop or just let me watch the scale and determine from it. Nope.

Sooo, Dude scoops some into a sample cup thing and puts it on the scale to demonstrate the smallest amount they sell (2 ounces). It was just under 2 ounces, btw. I told him that I would indeed like to purchase the smallest quantity of 2 ounces. There were two sizes of canisters by the scale, a large one (darn near the size of a coffee canister) and then one about 2/3 of that size. He grabbed the large one, started the spiel about it being my first time buying tea there that I needed to purchase the canister and I could bring it back each time for refills. Then went over the pricing, something about $6 then $7 then $3 extra...I don't know, it was getting drowned out by other noises. At that time he was already dumping the tea from the sample cup into the large canister on the scale and it went from like $6.72 to $10.87. The weight of the canister wasn't calibrated into the scale (something we had to do when packaging weighed food into containers at the store). I asked if I had to buy the canister. Again, since I was new I needed to have my tea put into it so it could be stored and then I could bring it back the next time I come in (What if I haven't finish the tea currently in it and wanted a different tea, hmm?). Then he talked about the benefits of it being an airtight container. So I continued to be difficult (I do feel bad about this since I know it's part of his job to push certain items) and told him I had airtight containers at home... Though he kept insisting that I need to buy this particular canister. After more of the ping-pong about not needing the canister, I finally told him I'm sorry,  I don't want the tea if I have to buy the canister. That's when he pulled out the quaint little foil baggie and informed me that he could sell me the tea in the bag...however it wouldn't hold up and will go stale after 5 days if not put in an airtight container. So he dumped the tea out of the canister, into the big container, and then scooped out a little over 2 ounces into the foil bag. I FINALLY was able to purchase the tea!

I want to give Dude major props though for doing his job! I know that it's a company thing and that they pressure you to use tactics to get sales and meet quotas. My "Grrrrr" is mainly aimed at Teavana because of that. I HATE it when employees are required to get customers to buy (or sign up for) things they don't want. It's irritating for the customer to feel harassed to spend more (or give out information they don't want to share) because that's what makes the big wigs at Corporate happy. :/

However, I will probably continue to shop at Teavana...not as much as I probably would prior to this experience, but I do enjoy the Acai Matetini.

Caveat Emptor.

Healthy Drink Ramble!

I was thinking about finally buying a Keurig (I've been debating this since I started working at Sears 3 years ago). I'm not a coffee (gave up that habit about age 6 #trufax) nor hot beverage drinker, but I do enjoy a frozen mocha-y drink whenever I'm feeling adventurous. Though I discovered that I really like the Chai Latte K-cups we have at work (breakroom incentive!). And I'd probably consume the mocha drinks on a regular basis if I had a Keurig. Then you have the option of the My K-cup to brew your own blends of whatever.

Yesterday Dr. Oz was talking about how white tea has a large amount of antioxidants in it so I want to start drinking white tea. Which then lead my thought process to using my potential future Keurig to brew tea, especially white tea. But upon further research I found at that white tea should steep at a lower temperature... So then I dug deeper into my psyche and realized that I mainly want a Keurig because it's cool, different, gimmicky, quick, and easy but again, I'm not normally a hot beverage consumer. Jump to "O hai, I wonder if there's a way I can just buy the K-cups I'm interested in and diy brew them myself??" Apparently there are ways...many ways depending on what type of beverage you want.

Well, since we have Teavana at the mall I work at and an independently owned tea store at the old mall I used to work at...why not just get some little infuser things or reusable tea bags and fancy blends of loose leaf tea? That sounds like fun! I could either get an electric kettle or *gasp* actually boil some water on the stove (I'd rather not go the microwave route even if it's super quick and easy).

I've been itching the get a Keurig recently since our store is in liquidation but really I'm not going to save that much on the machine. By the time the prices become "good," we'll already be sold out (happened during the last store closing). If by chance we have any for a "too good to pass up" deal, then sure, I'll buy one. But until then, I think I'll save a good bulk of money and use that for my future white tea addiction.

On this topic, I think I'm going to try to get into a habit of blending smoothies. Frozen spinach, berries, and orange juice sounds like a plan to me. Actually, anything to help improve my health is going to become more of a priority.

I'd been having pain all around my left shoulder blade for over a week. Then Monday I woke up and it was worse. From Monday through Wednesday I had problems when turning my head or moving my arm. I'd just lock up from the pain. Wednesday night I looked in the mirror and then took pics since my shoulder blade didn't feel right. The left one was poking out (at an odd angle) and about 3 inches higher than my right one. Yeah, this freaked me out. I went our chiropractor Thursday since I was off from work. My wreck may have had something to do with it but it's mainly stress. ...work stress. Apparently I've been having muscle spasms for a long time and not realizing it (I usually don't give much thought to pain unless it's reeeeally bad). And the muscle has tensed up and harden. It won't be much longer until that major stress trigger is out of my life. Until then, I've got to try to "relax" about work... Ha! It's difficult when you have to carry the weight for slacking employees.

And this is why I'm all giddy about beverages, especially ones with healthy potential. In my mind, they'll make everything better.

Which could be said about booze too, since it's a beverage. Yeah, I could use a strong fruity drink after work everyday...but that would be bad. Very bad! But oh so goooood!